Teething a.k.a Pure Hell for the parents

I know I have lost all sanity in my life!! Teething is PURE HELL!! Rykie is 10 months old not a tooth in sight but the symptoms are all there fussy, screeching, explosive shit, everything in her mouths and a bat shit crazy mom. If I could give her and myself drugs I would. I don't remember my twins being this bad but that was 17 years ago and I was so young and dumb I just don't remember. 

Here she is in action!! Nothing is off limits from going in her mouth. I guess she was low on fiber so it was time for a little toilet paper snack.

Wait....what....it's been 10 months since I had a baby!

Wow it is hard to believe that I had a baby 10 months ago! Like any parent I think she is the most adorable baby ever. You know because we all think are babies are just so pretty. I ran across my blog and I was like wow I forgot you even existed. So, here is to me saying that I will try and keep up with this blog. Let's be honest I have a mobile 10 month old and she is demanding of her mothers love and attention, so I will do my best.

So, lets start off by showing you a picture of my adorable baby!!                      

Awe.....oooohhhhh!

So, I am a Stay at Home Mom now. Wow this is the hardest job I know I have ever had. On call 24/7 no breaks, sleepless nights and so on. If anyone ever says that's the easiest job ever!! Are you freaking serious do you have children of your own. WTF!! I seriously hate people who say this shit. I want to go live with them PRETTY PLEAAAAASE! This little lady has consumed me I have spent a total of 5 hours away from her since she has been born!! I know gross!! I don't even want to add up the hours I will probably puke!! What is sleep? What is eating a meal without little hands reaching for your plate, oh and go to the restroom by yourself!!!! I can't even pee in peace!!

                                                                    She's the Boss!!

It has been 17 years since I had a baby!! Yes, I have twins that are 17 and a 10 month old. Don't even get me started on that!! The questions I get! Was she planned, oh my God, were you on drugs? Come on people keep that shit to yourself. Yes, she was planned!!!

So, lets just face it I am not your typical mother. I am blunt, honest, will not sugar coat and cuss like a sailor!! What can I say I was in the car business for 15 years and worked around a lot of men. Bad habit I know! this kid is like a parrot she mimics everything I say and do! Let's face it she's pretty smart she was been a walker since she was 9 months old!! I know I have got to be more careful with what I say and I am working on it!! I am no Saint!!

We are in the midst of teething and she is super moody so more on that later!! I have to tend to the evil teething Rykie Roo!! Her blood curdling scream is making me bat shit crazy!! 

So, sit back and enjoy the ride of Kara and Ryker!! Let me throw in one more picture just to make sure you realize how adorably cute she is!!

Slacking

Just call me a BIG SLACKER!! Wow I can't believe that it's been so long since I've blogged.

Well I can say I've been feeling so much better!! Thank you mini-human for no more feeling like I could blow chunks 24/7!! Ugh!! It's been 16 years since I was pregnant and let's just say I don't remember anything at all!! We will blame it on youth and stupidity.

So......... let me share with you the latest mini- human photo.

 

I can't figure out how to rotate the picture!!! Being pregnant there is not enough time in the world to make me want to sit here and figure that crap out. I have no patience at all!!

 

Well when we did the ultra-sound we found out the sex of the baby.

You see that lil bitty pink pumpkin.......YEP it's a GIRL!!! I had to ask the tech are you sure it's not a boy? Ummm no she is all girl!! Let's just say I need some navy bows!! I really thought I was having a little boy and started buying boy stuff. Nope it's a girl!! Hopefully she will not be to girly because I don't know what I'll do!!  She is healthy and that is what's most important. 

 

 

 

 

 

 



How many mini humans

Well we went to the doctor yesterday!!! Yay!! Super Super excited to share mini human's first picture!!

Look at it!! It's head is huge please tell me it will grow into that!! The doctor said at this stage their head is about as big as the body. I am so happy to report that I am only having one baby!!! So this will be a fun!! Twinolas were such hard work when they wore born and I always felt that I could never give enough love to each of them!! 

I was worried that at 36 I would be WAY to OLD for a baby!! Nope I am healthy and good. What a relief. I only have to go to Little Rock for genetics test for Arnold Chiari Malformation I had surgery for it back in 2005. So, we just want to make sure that the baby does not inherit it from me. 

This is me today 10 weeks!! I will be 11 weeks tomorrow!!!

Boobs are Belly

Good Saturday Morning!!! (Well you can see when I started the blog) Good Tuesday Afternoon!!

I have not been feeling to witty lately!! Just sickly!! Grrr.....where is the LIGHT!!!

Exciting news my first doctor visit is Thursday. Can I get a yay!!! I get to find out how many mini humans I have been growing. At this point I am going in with the thought of I am having twins again. I am big for 10 weeks BIG I tell you!!

This is me at 9 weeks! I feel Huge it does not help when you are a little shorty.

Let's see could there possibly one perk I have found in the 10 weeks that I have been pregnant. Boobs!! Hahaha........no not really but I'm pretty sure baby daddy would jump for glee at the rate these things are growing (he is all male so of course he is enjoying them) Me ugh no!! Let me just tell you something!! I think I need those baby mittens to keep on my hands!! When they grow they Itch so so BAD!!! Seriously, I did not remember this part from 16 years ago.

But I pretty sure if he knew how much it cost to contains these growing boobs he would not be jumping so high.

 Between the belly and the boobs nothing fits. Let's just face the facts buying maternity clothes SUCK!!!! I mean seriously!!

These pants are oh so sexy. I thought I would enjoy them because they are stretchy. But NO they are hot and it just feels so strange to have that band go to my boobs. I really did not think I would be wearing maternity clothes so soon but yes it has come to the high wasted pants!!

How in the hell did moms wear the "Mom Jeans"!?!  Don't you think maternity pants and mom jeans look similar. 

But I did find this awesome website and got a great deal on maternity clothes www.thredup.com 

They have lots of pre-loved items in great condition for cheap prices!! You get an amazing deal with your first purchase. You should totally check them out!!

Well hopefully I will do a much better job at keeping the blog up. Because if I told you all the shit that goes on a daily basis you probably would think this poor girl or wow she is just really full of shit!!

Hangry

HANGRY

For those of you that are not familiar with this term lemme break it down for you:

I was this way before I got pregnant just ask baby daddy!! It is at an all time high!! Or I am at an all time low really I should be embarrassed for the way I act (when it comes to food) but I'm not. There is no shame with me giving puppy dog eyes for a cookie. Just give the pregnant chick food trust me it is easier then receiving the laser eyes of death!!  

Let me start off saying that baby daddy was going to fix this Fantastic dinner!! My mouth was watering from the moment he sent me the text!! 

Well we both work in the car business so we have super L O N G H O U R S!!! So he ending up having to work late and asked if he could bring home food, this was at 7:48pm.  So I texted my ordered for  Mc Donalds yes, I know don't judge sometimes you just cave in for the cravings. I am telling you the struggle is so real!!! REAL I tell you!! I get a call at 9:15 pm saying I have ran out of gas!! What!!! You've ran out of gas seriously!! I just want my FOOD please tell me this is a JOKE by this time I would cut someone for SOME of those salty hot french fries!!

See that 9:27pm this is me waiting for him to run into Wal-Mart and get the gas can. Mind you my McDonalds is getting cold! Ain't nobody got time for cold french fries!!

 It's a good thing he's so pretty!!! At this point and time I am past the HANGRY stage we mentioned earlier. Seriously, all I can think about are those damn McDonald french fries. I know they are now a soggy cold mess!! But how can I bitch because it was so sweet of him to pick it up for me so I would not have to leave the house. But really all I can think is those hot  golden delicious french fries are now just limp soggy noodles!! 

Wahahahaa!!! Why!! Why me!!! I am not one of those glowing pregnant chicks once the sun goes down. I am more of the spawn of Satan as you can tell from the above picture. Glamorous I tell you!! 

This is us one street away from our house!!!!

Let me tell you even though they were cold soggy limp noodle french fries I ate every single one of them!! And it's hard to bitch at baby daddy when I know he's had a long day at work. So I thanked him last night and bitched this morning!! Hehe not to much it was more of giving him a hard time! Moral of this story is, if you are going to get a pregnant lady some food make sure you have enough gas to get you there and back or you could walk away missing a body part!!

Pregnancy is Awesome

Pregnancy is awesome.......

Really!?! Help me find the awesomeness!! Please did I miss a turn somewhere? Being nausea 24/7, feeling and looking like death. Throwing up!!!!! Really, I feel like I have a hangover like all the time! Before being pregnant at least I could just start drinking again! Then it never seemed so bad (Can I get an AMEN).  I can now say I am no longer embarrass to throw up in public places! You learn all kinds of new ways to stand and I've become a professional at closing my eyes and doing it because the restrooms were so GROSS!!! So, it there was ever a contest on new found ways to PUKE I know I would be on Top!! I've only puked in my hands once since becoming pregnant and let me tell you that was fun! It just so happened to be at work!

The greatest invention for not having to drag your toothbrush everywhere with you are these BAD BOYS

These guys are like my best friend!! So much easier then dragging my toothbrush around everywhere!! Seriously, I considered making a toothbrush necklace. I could pull off a blinged out toothbrush.

So, I often wonder do those other pregger ladies just lie and say oh it's so great to be pregnant! Seriously, the whole time has been awesome!?! Are they just saying that to not scare anyone!?! I sure wish I was blessed to be one of "those". Maybe it was because I was such a "Spirited Child" as my mother would say!! So, I get to experience every "side effect" of being pregnant.

I mean come on look at me! I look scary as hell!! Yes, that is a heating pad I jacked my neck up from all the puking and well for all of you that have been pregnant before know that all you can have is Tylenol. It does nothing for me, so I don't even bother with it I would just rather be miserable 

and look like the picture above! That is true picture of pregnancy it is not all about that GLOW! Most of the time you will feel like this!


I know there is light at the very very long tunnel!!! I just am so ready for it to start shinning a little.